The Spectator: How Many Bowl Games?

It’s getting out of hand. At last count there were almost 80 Bowl games scheduled to be played in the good old U.S.A. in December and January. Even football teams with losing records like 7-9, 5-8 are involved.

When I was a kid, there were five Bowl games. The top one was the Rose Bowl, followed by the Sugar Bowl, Cotton Bowl, Orange Bowl and Sun Bowl. Now we have the Quick Lane Bowl, the Idaho Potato Bowl, the Cactus Bowl, the Music City Bowl, the Dollar General Bowl, the Poinsettia Bowl and the Peach Bowl, to name a few.

Here are my selections for some future Bowl games and some that might have been held in the past that we didn’t know about!

The Recount Bowl – Hillary vs. Electoral College
Tepee Bowl – 7th Cavalry vs. Sioux Nation
Toilet Bowl – U.P. against Porcelain
Energy Bowl – O&R vs. Customers
Water Bowl – Suez Co. vs. Customers
Burger Bowl – Big Mac vs. Burger King
Got You! Bowl – IRS vs. Taxpayers
Coliseum Bowl – Nero vs. the Christians
Tire Bowl – Goodyear vs. Firestone
Sneaker Bowl – Adidas vs. Nike
Booze Bowl – Bud vs. Coors
Scotch Bowl – Dewars vs. Johnny Walker Red
Barbecue Bowl – Ribs vs. Steaks
Picnic Bowl – Burgers vs. Hot Dogs
Saratoga Bowl – Red Coats vs. Blue Coats
The Traitors Bowl – Benedict Arnold vs. Judas
Crooners Bowl – Sinatra vs. Crosby
Fairy Bowl – Snow White vs. Cinderella
Rainbow Bowl – Dorothy vs. The Wizard of Oz
Deluge Bowl – Noah vs. the Flood
Slow Bowl – Snail vs. the Turtle
Cookie Bowl – Oreos vs. Mallomars
Dog Bowl – Nathans vs. Ball Park
Thirst Bowl – Pepsi vs. Coke
Underwear Bowl – Briefs vs. Shorts
Wine Bowl – Red vs. White
Pickle Bowl – Dill vs. Sweet
Hold-Up Bowl – Suspenders vs. Belts
Breakfast Bowl – Quaker Oats vs. Cheerios
Egg Bowl – Scrambled vs. Fried
Sling Shot Bowl – David vs. Goliath
Horror Bowl – Dracula vs. Frankenstein
General Bowl – Lee vs. Grant
Bean Bowl – Heinz vs. Campbell
Media Bowl – Trump vs. N.Y. Times
Soap Bowl – Dial vs. Ivory
Cheese Bowl – American vs. Swiss
Nose Bowl – Durante vs. Pinocchio
Chiefs Bowl – Clarkstown vs. Mike Sullivan

Well dear readers, I’ve given you a few. You could probably add a dozen more. Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas and a healthy and happy New Year